Drift boat rules: The Oarlock Warlock

Call me the “Oarlock Warlock.” Because if you are fishing from the front of my dory, and you start firing casts that land behind the oarlocks (thus cutting off the water for the poor “tail gunner” fishing from the back), one of three things is going to magically happen:

1) You will find the bow of the boat pointed out toward the middle of the river, so your casts just got 15 feet longer, and your angle just got a lot tougher…

2) A stream of water from the Super Soaker will blast your grasshopper fly right off the surface…

3) Said Super Soaker will “misfire” and hit you squarely in the back. Which, granted, is a favor in August, and not so much in October.

Good drift boat manners are not seasonal. Most people don’t realize they’re poaching each other’s water and some don’t care. But some do. I once had two brothers almost come to blows over this very issue. And don’t even get me started on the husband-wife deal… suffice it to say, if you want to test a marriage, fish out of a drift boat together.

So, for the sake of world peace and happy relationships, just remember the oarlock divider rule. Fire your casts well ahead of the boat, and stop your drifts by the time the bug is even with the oarlocks, and everything is hakuna matata.

Anyone care to disagree, or have a better plan?

— Kirk Deeter

By Chris Hunt.